Thursday, August 18, 2005


"Listen Pal, Don't Tell Me I Don't Know Jack Schitt...!!"

Today, while on the dock, I heard two fishermen arguing about fishing techniques, and types of baits to be using at this time of year. They argued, and argued, and I listened. Finally, they asked me to be a mediator, and asked my opinion on their argument. Well, I had to side with one of the fellows, as it was obvious he was a good "hook", and from my experience, what he was saying was correct, so I let my opinion be known. Well, the fellow who had the contrary opinion to mine got quite upset. He got annoyed, and told me "who do you think you are?" and "you don't know jack-shit!" Well, now I was becoming annoyed, and I clenched my fists, and gritted my teeth. I eyed his "glass" chin, and then his "pudgy" solar-plexus! Either target would have him prone on the ground with one blow! Alas, my blood pressure went down immediately, as in my old age I have found that assaulting someone on the dock of the Air Service that I am employed by would not be prudent. My hand did fly into the air, though, and I pointed a finger at his "weasel" face. "Listen, Pal, I have been flying the bush for over 20 years, and I have forgotten more than you will ever know!" I told him. "And by the way, don't ever tell me I don't know 'Jack Schitt'! I have known him for about 20 years, also!" I then explained myself.

After my lecture, the "weasel"-faced fisherman apologized, and hat in hand, left the dock. I had proved my point, and I didn't even have swollen knuckles! (I must be getting old!) Anyways, in the future, if you are ever confronted by some "belligerent putz" that tells you that you don't know "jack-shit", prepare yourself ahead of time!


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